Sunday, May 2, 2010

That is so cliche!

Both my parents spoke almost entirely in cliches, euphemisms and metaphors. As a child, I assumed everyone talked this way. This did not help my social life...at all. You do not gain popularity points, or even a single 'high-five' when your only retort to a elementary school punk is, "Takes one to know one!" "I know you are, but what am I? " might have gone over a wee bit better. Though, I'm sure I used that too. The mocking and laughing has yet to cease. I MUST purge myself once and for all!

Though I love to use the "qouties", I must leave them off this list in fear of resenting them.


Getting too big for your britches. (Usually followed up with a "Missy" or "Young lady")
I don't/wouldn't trust him/her any farther than I can throw them.
That money burning a hole in your pocket?? ( Yeeeees, indeed it is!)
Diarrhea of the mouth. (I heard this several times a day; apparently I talk a lot. It still makes me gag.)
Cat got your tongue? (Very seldom used)
Not for all the tea in China.
Your eyes are bigger than your stomach. (Meaning you ordered/fixed more than you could eat.)
Baby sh*t green/brown. (Mom used this a lot to describe ugly brown or green colors.)
Pardon my French. (Followed the previous)
It went down the wrong pipe. (When someone is choking. I prefer the Heimlich.)
Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer. (Do I ask a lot of questions?)
Don't hold your breath.
It cost an arm and a leg.
I'd give my right arm for...
Like a chicken with it's head cut off. :-/
Take your coat off and stay awhile.
Naked as a jaybird.
I'll beat you with a wet noodle. (Sooo violent, my Mom!)
Don't look a gift horse in the mouth.
The pot calling the kettle black.
It's right up your alley.
One foot on a the grave and the other on a banana peel.
My teeth are floating. (You gotta pee...badly.)

That's it. I can't do anymore!! But, trust me...there are many, many more. These are merely the most popular ones in my household. I may not be a "spring chicken" or anything, but I shouldn't sound like someone's Great Grammy!

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